My youngest daughter (sometimes known in my on line circles as Thing 3) and I took a trip to visit my older daughter (Thing 2). We had plans to see She and Him in concert at the Bank of America Pavilion in Boston. My husband had bought these tickets shortly before he passed away. The girls and I love the band. He wasn’t a huge fan, but just loved music of any kind (except country!) and spending time with his kids. The girls and I had a nice time. We rode the T and did a lot of walking and entertained each other with memories of his running commentaries during such excursions. He was a big guy with a lot of aches and pains. His complaints were legitimate but his delivery was so funny that it was hard to take him seriously. One year he and I went down for the 4th and walked around for hours with Thing 2 and her roommate. We all had sore feet but he had “no ankles and no ass” after walking for miles and then sitting on a concrete curb for hours waiting for the fireworks.
When we arrived for the concert we were approached by a young lady who works for Live Nation. She was very engaging and friendly and we were laughing and having a nice chat. Out of the blue she asked “Where’s the mister”? The girls and I just looked at each other and finally she said.. “Oh, I guess it’s not his thing”. Why would anyone ask one woman in a group of three where her husband is? I bet I could have ruined her night with an honest answer.
The concert was great. Camera Obscura opened. I had never heard them. She and Him played all of my favorites and did an a capella version of Unchained Melody. It was amazing. I had a few weepy moments. He would have loved the concert, the time with the girls, all of it. Having to take 2 buses and 2 trains to go a few miles, not so much. However, he probably would have contributed some real gems to the family quote book.
Last night we were at a waterfront concert seeing the Happy Together Tour with the Buckinghams, Grass Roots, Gary Puckett, Mickey Dolenz of the Monkees and Flo and Eddie of the Turtles. Aside from my daughter I was probably the youngest person there! When the performers would ask “What were you doing when this song was a hit (in 1968, 1969! ?)” while most in the audience were in the service or high school/college I was in the first grade. I thought it was pretty funny that even with my (new!) gray hair I was one of the babies in the crowd. We almost missed the show. Youngest daughter (Thing 3) was in charge of the tickets. She was the one that first heard of it and talked her father out of his credit card to buy them. They were electronically sent to her email account. All summer we were all thinking the concert was Sat, the 28th. She thought it was at 5:30, I thought 7:30. I asked several times this week for her to check. She finally did. Last night at 6:40. We live an hour from the venue. Her father was out mowing the lawn and was very hot and sweaty. I had been doing housework. In 10 minutes we had both showered and changed while she printed off the tickets and away we went. I said we would miss most of the show, not be able to park, etc. etc., but we wanted to see at least some of it for the 150.00 we spent on tickets. We got there at 7:50 and had only missed some of the first group (The Buckinghams) and miracle of miracles there was a (free!) parking space right at the gate!! We had front row seats. The bands were awesome. Was Gary Puckett always so dramatic? At the end they all performed together. It was a great night out. My daughter snagged a guitar pick from the Grass Roots guitarist and she and my husband both got Mickey Dolenz autographs. Since we missed dinner, on the way home we stopped off for a plate of eggs and finally got to bed well after midnight.
Since I’m having radiation daily, not to mention the emotional upheaval of the last few weeks, I’ve been very tired. I planned on a quiet, restful Saturday so I would be fresh for the concert and a nice dinner out. In order for that to happen I didn’t stop all day Friday. I cleaned the house from top to bottom, did all the laundry (including hanging it out), the daily one hour round trip for treatment, did groceries, and spent several hours at my desk. Just as I was about to take a hot bath and relax, we were flying down the highway to a concert. I’m glad I ignored my knee jerk reaction to stay home and just let the two of them go. All my life I’ve been a planner (and bit of control freak) and I’m sure I’ve missed out on a lot of fun because I hadn’t planned it ahead. I’m the least spontaneous person I know. Maybe cancer has given me a gift. After all, I didn’t plan on having cancer or spending the better part of a year fighting it, but there it is. It hasn’t stopped me from living my life. I’ve just made room for it (for now). I didn’t plan on losing my sister in such an unexpected and heartbreaking way, but that happened too and we are dealing with it and going on because we have no choice. One thing she always did was make time for fun and family, even if it meant letting things go that she was just too tired to do like housework or staying on top of other responsibilities. It drove me crazy at times but I’m so glad now that she knew what was important. Certainly not planning out every minute of your day/week.
Thank you, Debbie, for that. And…well.. Fuck you, Cancer. (no one really thought I would thank cancer, did you?)