Today I played the cancer card

I got one of those annoying phone calls from an obnoxious telemarketer excitely telling me I had WON. He told me to grab a pen and I dutifully pretended to. Then he blathered on and on about my prizes while I filed my nails.  Finally.. the rub. I had to come (with my husband) to claim my prize and sit through a quick demonstration.  Now normally I cut these jokers off at the pass but I let this kid go through the whole spiel. And then I said “Oh next week? I won’t be able to make it. I’ll be receiving cancer treatments.  The week after? Sorry, I’ll probably be too sick”.  Awkward silence.  “Matt? are you still there?”   click.

I’m easily amused these days.



  1. lawyermomfashionistal · February 3, 2012

    ^5, mainley. :giggle


  2. suzeq740 · February 3, 2012



  3. suzeq740 · February 3, 2012

    And you keep taking my lines LOL.. I had that one filed away 🙂


  4. yapa123 · February 3, 2012

    Love it!


  5. Carina · February 3, 2012

    Outstanding. I can’t pull that off.


  6. Herdy · February 3, 2012

    You start to develop a really black sense of humour don’t you….my mum keeps telling me off for it….but it’s good to have a little fun with it!


  7. rachturner · February 3, 2012

    Ha ha!! That is awesome!! If you can’t have fun with your cancer, then what’s the point, right? It’s good not to take everything so seriously. I use the cancer card at work all the time and my friends just laugh with me about it. Good for you! 🙂


  8. jelebelle · February 3, 2012

    nice work, have you read Kriss Carr’s book..”Crazy, Sexy Cancer”? She has a passage about when to use the cancer card. pretty funny, keeps things real. i admit i’ve used it while flying and with late bills.


  9. Misifusa · February 4, 2012

    I think we’ve all used it at one point or another. I allowed one telemarketer to go on about how they help so many breast cancer patients with money etc. and when she asked me to donate, I asked her why as a cancer patient I never heard from them nor got anything from them. Then she started stuttering and hung up.
    Yes, I giggled afterwards…


  10. Jimmy Aring · February 5, 2012


    sorry to hear about your illness but I was buoyed by your willingnees to be humourous with telepests about it. The good thing is, is that laughter is the best medicine. My wife turned 50 a week ago and as part of our celebrating we saw John Cleese at ‘An evening with John Cleese.’ Laughter has a way of keeping me afloat when things are, well, sinking.
    Cheers Jimmy


  11. Tara · February 13, 2012

    I love your spunk! I once stopped a bill collector by saying “well my daughter just got put in the hospital because she tried to kill herself.” It was true of course and maybe I’m a cad for using it but I wasn’t in the mood to hear about my credit card bill that I charged up on medical expenses! Chin up!


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