My thoughts

… are kind of all over the place these days.   First of all the job. Yeah.  I may have made a mistake.  Probably should have let the dust settle a little bit.  I applied for this job exactly 3 weeks after my husband died. What the hell was I thinking?  I guess I panicked a little regarding finances, insurance, etc.  So.. here I am at 51 years old with 30 years experience working an entry level job for the insurance.  Don’t get me wrong.. the job is okay.. nothing terribly interesting, but busy and I like that. Love my coworkers.  The trouble you ask?  Somewhere along the way, during the shit storm what was my life over the past two years, I seem to have lost my filter.  Replacing it is on my short list (as in nevah gonna happen in this lifetime).  I simply don’t care what I say and to whom.   I just don’t. I don’t go out of my way to offend, but if you choose to be offended by something I say? Tuff shit. You can imagine how well that goes over in the work place.   One of my coworkers thought I was a bit on the prissy side until I let loose with a string of expletives. She was relieved.  It’s the hair. Fools em every time.

On  the home front. Ever wish you could have one more conversation with a loved one that had passed on?  Do you imagine it in your mind?  I have these little one sided conversations all the time with my sister and my husband (not out loud, I haven’t turned the bend completely).  They are usually mundane, every day things… nothing maudlin or sweetly out of character.  Today I wish I could ask my beloved why he kept certain items.  Like the princess tiara and the duck lips that sound like a kazoo. Yes. I tried them. Don’t judge me.  It’s been a stressful week. I think I will wear them to work tomorrow. The lips, not the tiara.  I’m saving that for special.




  1. Tina Levy · November 3, 2013

    you totally ROCK Susan… your humor is so Wonderful… Hugs, Tina


  2. Karen · November 3, 2013

    Love your humor Susan. Miss you and hope to see you soon. xoxo


  3. Laura Renegar · November 3, 2013

    Love your honesty and humor. Just keep going girl. No matter what anyone says!


  4. Professor VJ Duke · November 3, 2013

    The professor sends his greetings. You remind him of someone he knows and runs into often at gatherings. Are you a Punchyish person?


  5. playfulpups · November 3, 2013

    I appreciate people with little to no filter- it’s honesty at it’s purest.


  6. The Presents of Presence · November 4, 2013

    Susan, sending hugs to you ~ I talk to my Dad often and my Mom does too. So far he doesn’t talk back. ♥ I understand. xo


  7. karen sutherland · November 5, 2013

    susan, the honesty you write with, along with your inimitable humor makes reading every one of your posts so worthwhile. and who needs a damn filter anyway? wearing the duck lips to work – hilarious! sending many warm hugs to you. xoxo


  8. myeyesareuphere · November 5, 2013

    Much love to you, Susan!


  9. Wife After Death · November 5, 2013

    Brilliant. X


  10. chemobrainandmore · November 5, 2013

    Hell you earned having no filter! It shows u are a real person, and if people don’t like it then they don’t have to liston.


  11. theempathyqueen · December 20, 2013

    I enjoy your posts and your honesty. Your photos are great. But I can understand the filter thing; You have been through to much and seen so many things, that you simply have no room for other people’s bullshit. People can be clueless and say stupid things (which ought to be painful frankly).


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